Have you ever experienced the feeling – creatively and professionally – of being ‘on hold?’
You have done all the work. You have submitted, sold, pitched, put your ideas out into the world, launched projects and hit send on those important connection emails, but you’re still waiting for the date when all the hard work is released, seen, acknowledged, or accepted. Until then, all you hear is radio silence and you feel empty. You feel like you should be doing something – even when you have done enough. Even when you are not sure what else to do.
You are floating in limbo, waiting for something to transpire from all your work. Those quiet, inactive periods can cause creatives to feel lost, and they can stretch on for days or weeks. You are like that aircraft primed to land but waiting for permission to do so. You know you should chill out and take a moment, but it is hard, as forward momentum has ceased. Nothing is happening. Something should be happening.
Your efforts are not (yet) giving you any results. Feeling like this can also lead to making silly or unnecessary decisions, so watch yourself. You don’t want to rush a good thing. You need to accept these moments are the period when the stew is brewing. Good things take time, as it is said. Trust the process. That one is said too. But these pithy sayings are little comfort.
We are currently experiencing this holding pattern. It feels like we have projects that are perpetually close to wrap or to progressing to the next phase of production, but never quite ready to land. Right now Ivan is editing yet another version of Cats of Malta, a 60 minute version for our US distributor and PBS. There is already a 30 minute version, plus a 20 minute version requested by the New York Cat Festival, and of course the original 69 minute version. Ivan feels like he is stuck in Groundhog Day editing the same footage over and over again.
Meanwhile, I am sending emails and pitches to underwriters for our PBS broadcast. Waiting to hear back. Not hearing back. Following up. Waiting to hear back. Following up. Waiting again.
We are also trying to reach picture lock on No Woman is an Island. A key aspect holding us up is trying to get permission and clearance for all the images, videos, and music we want to use. Again, email after email, ask after ask, wait after wait. It has been going on for months.
The bigger stuff is also a waiting game – waiting for our films to go live on new platforms, waiting to hear back from platforms after pitching them our catalog and our favourite – waiting for distributors or platforms to pay us our cut of sales well past due.
Our professional and creative lives at the moment are defined by waiting on others. Maybe it is the natural downtime of December and January. But when you are a workaholic like me, all this sitting around, waiting on permissions to progress, is frustrating as hell. And super stressful.
But I know I need to breathe. With all creative pursuits, even writing, and especially filmmaking you have to depend on and wait for others, so this ‘holding pattern' feeling comes and goes. We wait for feedback on an edit, wait for the colourist to finish the latest pass, wait around on set while actors are in make-up and you are ready to film. Waiting is part of collaboration.
So what does all this serve to teach creatives? No matter how hard you plan, most of the time when collaborations or partnerships happen you will feel like this, it’s normal. You can’t control everything. It’s been ingrained into our mindset over many years that society values and rewards those who are hustling hard and also producing something, anything, at all hours of the day.
I’m telling you though, from experience – fruit that is worth eating is best not picked before ripe. Don’t fall into the trap of everything, everywhere all at once. Go with the flow, and if you flow into a holding pattern, accept it. We are all about progress but sometimes to truly progress, you need to practice patience first.
Written by Sarah Jayne